A Time Slipped Away

underneath the quiet trees
stop along the way
resting in a whispered breeze

a few moments’ ease
pass some hours today
underneath the quiet trees

as time seems to freeze
reverie holds sway
resting in a whispered breeze

as long as you please
cares sent off to play
underneath the quiet trees

where no one else sees
there’s no price to pay
resting in a whispered breeze

chance is there to seize
peaceful hideaway
underneath the quiet trees
resting in a whispered breeze

– – – – – – – –
This is a poetic mashup – or as I like to call it: a Frankenpoem

Okay, here’s the deal on this one: It’s a Tanka mated with a Villanelle. The layout of the lines and the rhyme scheme follows the Villanelle form. The lines are 5 and 7 syllables as follows: The setup stanza is 7-5-7, the next four are 5-5-7, and the close is 5-5-7-7. Essentially, the two lines which repeat are the only two 7-syllable lines you will write. The rest are 5-syllable. There is no punctuation used. I made my title a 5-syllable line rhymed with the “b” rhymes in my Tankanelle, but that’s just me. By the way, consider this a challenge – if you dare: take two poem forms and combine their characteristics. I have done different ones by taking two forms, such as a Cinquain and a Tanka and interleaving the lines of the two. I’d love to see your results!

1 reply on “A Time Slipped Away”

I’ve always been disappointed that this piece drew no comments. I would have liked to know what readers thought of it.


Leave a Reply

Please log in using one of these methods to post your comment: Logo

You are commenting using your account. Log Out /  Change )

Google photo

You are commenting using your Google account. Log Out /  Change )

Twitter picture

You are commenting using your Twitter account. Log Out /  Change )

Facebook photo

You are commenting using your Facebook account. Log Out /  Change )

Connecting to %s